Diagnosis... blessing

You may find this hard to believe, but my first year teaching, I taught second grade.  I thought I wanted to work with younger kids.  But, as a 22 year old and fresh out of college, I was not prepared for the experiences that second graders in Marion were going to give me.  I had no idea that I would tie shoes, wipe noses and deal with lice.  I had no idea that I would get hugs and smiles that I would still remember some twelve years later... I had no idea that some of these kids would completely change my life.

I distinctly remember a child moving in, and from day one, I knew he was going to be a challenge.  The first day he was there he told me he wanted to jump out the window.  I was on the second floor of a building with no air conditioner, so the windows were open.  That scared the crap out of me!  I also remember this child laying on his back and weaving himself between the legs of the desks.  I remember thinking, "what is wrong with this kid?!?!?"  Then, I received his records.  He was diagnosed with ADHD, and was not medicated.  (I found out later that the reason he wasn't medicated was because one of his parents was abusing and selling his medicine...grrr!!!)  I remember days leaving school feeling completely exhausted and overwhelmed.  I remember thinking, "I cannot do this ONE MORE DAY!"  I also remember thinking, "I hope I never have a kid like this!"  

I can say now, that I was not as patient as I should have been with that little boy or with most of the kids in that class. They don't teach you in college how to deal with kids who "act as if driven by a motor."  Those are things that you have to learn through experience.  I can say, that the kids in Marion gave me a good hands on learning experience!

I really hope they have forgiven "Miss Gwubb" for not being as patient with them.  

So, here we are 13 years later... My own kid is diagnosed with ADHD and SPD (sensory processing disorder).  I have to say that this diagnosis has completely changed my view on kids with ADHD.  It has made me realize that, while some people tend to think ADHD is over-diagnosed, I know it is real.  I live it every day... at home and at school.

This diagnosis has been somewhat of a blessing.  First and foremost, it has made me realize that I am not a "bad mommy."  So many times l felt like like a bad mommy because I couldn't control my own kid.  People would stare when he would have a melt-down in public or because I had to say his name 50 times (sometimes I would joke that he was in the witness protection program and wasn't used to his new name...).  I have realized that I have to advocate for him and teach him to advocate for himself.  It has made me think about the kids that I come into contact with on a daily basis.  I think about how I want my kid to be treated.  I realize that I am dealing with someone's "baby," just as there are teachers dealing with my baby.  I always think to myself, "if that were my kid, how would I want him to be treated?"  I have become so much more patient with kids with ADHD.

I think back to those second graders in Marion and realize that they probably taught me more than I taught them, even though I didn't realize it until many years later.