Teachers are the WORST at listening to/ following directions!

Do you know how many times I say to my students, "Follow the directions!" or "Take your time, read the directions and do a good job!"  I guess it is time to take my own advice...

At the beginning of the school year, the boys were bringing home tons of paperwork. Some for us to fill out and some for informational purposes.  Most of the time, I get the papers out of their bags and see if there is a date or something on it and I make sure I either fill it out, sign it or get whatever important event on the calendar.  Grayson's curriculum night paper was red.  It was easy to pick out of the pile.  One would assume that any message on red paper would be fairly important.  So, I read it- Thursday, September 6th, 6:30-7:30.  I put it on the calendar.  On to the next paper...

On Thursday, September 6th, Tom got home from work right around 6:00, so Grayson and I got ready and headed out the door.  We had a lot to talk about on the way there.  (Ok, when DOESN'T Grayson have a lot to talk about... "acts as if driven by a motor," yes, that is my kid).  As we pulled up to the school, the parking lot was packed, but I found a place in the grass to park.  As I got out of the car, Grayson was reprimanding me for parking in the grass.  "You aren't supposed to do that mommy!  You are going to get your clip moved to red!!! You are going to the principal!!!"  All I could think was, "Just MOVE Grayson! We just got here, I don't want to be the last one in so everyone stares at us!"  As we walked in, I figured we would be one of the last ones there.  But I wasn't REALLY paying attention... I was trying to keep Grayson out of the puddles, I was trying to figure out what was all over his hands (turns out it was baby oragel, the kind in the little pump bottle... he must have pumped it all out on our way there.  It was all over his hands and shorts).  We get into the school, walk down what seemed like the LONGEST hallway and finally got to his room.  When we arrived the door was closed.  So, Grayson decided to make his grand entrance by flinging the door open!  To my surprise, there were NO OTHER KIDS IN THERE!!!! I felt my face turn instantly red and I tried to pretend like I knew it was an adult only thing.

Grayson proudly pointed me in the direction of his seat.  It was, of course, right in the front.  The teacher had already started speaking, and I quickly pulled out the Barbie sized chair to sit down.  Grayson sat in front of me, and I really don't think I heard a thing his teacher said as I tried to look around and see the parents of the children who Grayson would be spending close to 180 days with.  My focus returned to Grayson as I found him now sitting on the floor and licking... YES LICKING the bottom of his Under Armour slides.  "Yuck!!!" I said... "STOP DOING THAT!!!" Again, I feel my face turning every shade of red.  Again, I had no clue what the teacher was saying.

As I got Grayson redirected, someone showed up late and this mom had her daughter with her.  Is it bad that I was REALLY glad to see that someone else didn't follow the directions too?!?!?!

At that moment, I noticed that the other parents were opening the packets that were placed on the little tables/ desks.  So, I did the same thing.  As I did, something caught my eye.  I turn my head to the left to see Grayson lying on his back, kicking his feet up in the air.  Ugh!!! "Grayson, SIT UP!!!"  At this point, I was planning my escape route.  Could I pretend like I got a phone call and needed to leave? Nope, I left my cell phone in the car.  Could I pretend like Grayson was sick and we needed to go?  Not really, he does NOT play along well.  AAAHHH!! What could I do?!?!? What could I do to get myself out of this really, really uncomfortable position?

I went back to looking in the folder with Grayson's name on it.  I looked at the apple he colored and compared it to his next door neighbor.  Yeah, maybe her's was better... but I bet Grayson was cuter, right?  I mean, does he REALLY need to know how to color in the lines to graduate from kindergarten? Nah...

When I realize that I had been thinking about this too long, I felt something under the table.  I looked under the table and realized it was Grayson slithering on his back under the table making snake noises.  I was about to lose it.  I grabbed him up from the floor and sat him on my lap.  I was trying really hard not to say anything for fear that I may raise my voice a little too much.  I could tell we were nearing the end of the presentation and I heard the teacher say, "So, are there any questions?"  Grayson's hand immediately flies up.  As quickly as his hand went up, my hand grabbed his arm and pulled it back down. "OOOWWW Mommy! You are hurting my arm!" As I am sure you could imagine, my face was red again.  I was hoping... PRAYING that people wouldn't ask questions so I could get the heck out of there!!  No such luck... people asking questions about the bus, about the field trip, about the breakfast program.  AH! Come on people!

Finally, the presentation was over, parents stopped asking questions and it was time to go.  As quickly as I could, I got up out of that darn miniature chair and made a bee line for the door.  Grayson is quickly following me... "Mommy, do you want to see where the bathroom is? Mommy! Mommy! Do you want to see where the water fountain is?"  I slowed to take a look at the bathroom and water fountain.  As we exited the building I kept asking myself, "did that paper say to not bring your kids? I swear I thought it said it was for kindergarden students and their parents and not other children! I hope I  still have that paper so I can look at it when we get home!"

As soon as we got home, I went straight to the kitchen to find the red paper in question.  I immediately found it.  I scan to the bottom where it says, bolded and in all caps, "Students are NOT to attend curriculum night." Nice Jenn, really nice.

Lesson learned... I need to slow down... take my time and READ what is being sent home!  By doing just that, I will save myself a lot of embarrassment!